Monday, December 27, 2010

What’s a Girl to Do?

 “But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do.”
1 Peter 1:15 (NIV)

What to do?  What to do?   The thoughts stumbled around my head as I organized another day’s to-do list.  Item number 1 – feed kids.  Number 2 – change that smelly diaper.  Number 3 – get coffee.  No!  Scratch that.  Coffee first… the kids can wait.   That’s me.  I make lists and check them twice.  I do things well.   

Like the swirling steam of my brewing beans, the sweet voice of the Lord saturated my senses.  “Relationships” He whispered.  “Scratch your do-ing.  Today I want you to be.”

I prayed for just this; begged for it even.  A word; a single word from my God, and now that He delivered I wished He would take it back.  Throw away my to-do list?!  What’s a girl to do?

According to the Myers-Briggs personality assessment, I am an introvert.  I love quiet time...alone.  I raved for weeks about having a full eight hours of peaceful bliss on a recent airline trip.   

Mr. Myers and Mr. Briggs would also call me a “thinker” (as opposed to a “feeler”).  If given the choice, I would pour over Calvin’s Institutes of the Christian Religion before attending Hallmark’s Annual Greeting Card Convention.

Introverted thinkers can do a great many things.  We can will ourselves to run (and finish!) a 10 mile race after recovering from major knee surgery.  We can gather our perfectly dressed family for the perfect Christmas photo on Hawaii’s perfect beach to create a bazillion perfect Christmas cards.  We can even change diapers, feed the masses, and dig up a cup of coffee all before 7am!  But we can’t do relationships.  You must be in relationship.

“Be” as a prefix denotes nearness or closeness; to remain or be fixed.  In the Hebrew language, this prefix means to stand by.  There is nothing to do when you are be-ing, except to stay where you are.  To be in relationship blows that whole notion of quality time vs. quantity time right out of the water.  God’s relationships are defined by quantity: Stand by me and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10); submit to God and remain at peace with him (Job 22:21); just as he who called you is holy, stand near his holiness in all you do (1 Peter 1:15).

If my extensive to-do list boasts beautiful accomplishments, but neglects relationships - I accomplish nothing.  If I run the race arrogantly smirking every time I pass those less experienced than me - I am just another competitor.  If my perfect Christmas card fails to reflect the perfect beauty of the season but instead reflects my misplaced perfectionism – I gain nothing.  Love is not grumpy when my family’s early morning wake-up interferes with the day's to-do list.   Love changes diapers, feeds children, and delays coffee.  Love never fails. 

The funny thing is that God doesn’t ask me to stop do-ing at all, He just asks me to be holy while I’m do-ing it all. “But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do” (1 Peter 1:15, NIV).   

What to do?  What to do?  The thoughts stumble around my head as I now contemplate how to be holy in all that I do.

What wisdom can you share with a Mom seeking to be holy in all she does?

Dear Lord, help us to be near, fixed to, and standing by our loved ones.  Help us to put aside our to-do lists in favor of being in relationship with the ones You gave us this day.  For this is the day that You have made.  Let us rejoice and be glad in it!  In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Love-Wise by Bill & Pam Farrel (

Honest believers that anyone can have great relationships!  Join them in discovering how to make all your relationships work better.


  1. This is really great... I have such a hard time not doing and just BEING but it's such an important thing to do.

  2. :) I love this. You have made this do-er smile. I struggle so much with just being. But it is what we are called to do. To be. :)

    I love your point that we cannot "do" relationships. We must "be" in them. How often do I try so hard to "do" my relationship with God...and with others. Great stuff to think on today!

    So glad you stopped by my blog!
    Blessings to you!


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